


Streetswept

by weekendsareforwhiskey



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M, and barely counts as a PxS fic, but it popped into my head and needed to get out, this is very dumb fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-08-03 00:02:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16315211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weekendsareforwhiskey/pseuds/weekendsareforwhiskey
Summary: Sansa wakes up at 7:10 on a Wednesday morning. That's a problem. Her recluse neighbor is helpful.





	Streetswept

For once in her life Sansa awoke without her alarm. The late morning light shining through her window was what interrupted her deep sleep. She turned over and checked her phone to see if Willas had texted her and then saw the day and time. Wednesday. 7:10 am. The terror, that was realizing she had not reset her alarm the night before for this particular day, was what made her jump out of bed. She threw a cardigan over her pajamas and shoved on the closest pair of shoes she could find.  She rushed out of her room, into the hall, and out the front door to see an empty street save for her car. But there was no dreaded white ticket on her car. Yet.

 

“Fantastic,” she muttered. There was barely anyone out at the ungodly hour of seven am and she cursed the city official who decided that seven to nine in the morning would be the street-sweeping hours for her block. A block away from her was the street with the reasonable hour of nine am to twelve pm, but _no_ her street had to be _seven in the morning._ Every Wednesday she considered moving simply for that privilege since it was hell for her bartending hours when she’d come home at two in the morning the night before, only to find that the side streets were full of her neighbors’ cars who, like her, didn’t have a driveway. Who was even privileged enough to have one of the older homes in the city that hadn’t been knocked down into duplexes without driveways nowadays?

 

There were one or two houses on her street of course. And she spied the grumpiest occupant of one of them coming out of his house. She didn’t know his name, but in their three years of living across the street from one another, she’d observed a bit about him. He had three newspapers delivered to his driveway, where he parked his vintage Volvo every day; he rarely came outside of his house but if he was out at the same time as her he was either in a bathrobe or jeans and a t-shirt. (She’d seen him in a suit one time and she’d done a double-take out her window when she saw him drive away.) And he’d never spoken a word to her even when she repeatedly tried to make cheery conversation, or at least just acknowledged his presence with a simple hello. He irked her almost as much as the street-sweeping time determiner.

 

At least the newspaper person was vindictive enough when Sansa couldn’t be, as the papers always landed _just_ at the tip of the man’s driveway. For once, as she walked across the street to her car, she hoped that she wouldn’t have to make eye contact with him. While she loved her pink and white striped pajamas, they weren’t something she wanted others to see her in the street in. But just as she looked back over at him she caught the man’s eye. To be neighborly and polite like she always was she waved. He blinked. Sipped his coffee. And blinked again. Well, a blink was something. When she got to her car she dug through her pajama pockets. Then her cardigan pockets. It was no use.  She’d left her keys in her house.

 

“ _Oh my god_ ,” she groaned and sprinted back across the street. It was quiet enough that she could hear the man laugh. She turned around in time to see his smirk before he headed back to his front door. “Asshole.”

 

Once she’d retrieved her car keys and her phone she ran back outside. A car driving across the road was the only thing keeping her between her car and-

 

“Wait! Wait! I’m moving it right now!”

 

In the minute that she’d taken to find her keys, the parking officer had arrived with his booklet and pen in hand. He looked up at his watch and then at her.

 

“It’s 7:12. Street-sweeping starts at 7.”

 

She wanted to mention the fact that street-sweeping had _not_ started at 7 as they were both in the street that had yet to be swept, but she decided kindness might be her best option while he kept the booklet open and pen at the ready.

 

“I’m so sorry. I forgot today was Wednesday but I have my keys I’m about to move it right now!” She unlocked the car and the officer stepped aside. He slipped the booklet into his pocket and Sansa sighed. “Thank you _so_ much.”

 

She closed the door and turned the key in the ignition. Or rather, _she tried_ to turn the key in the ignition. She adjusted the wheel and then turned the key. Her house keys and key chains jangled against the steering wheel but nothing else happened.

 

“No. No. No,” she muttered to herself without looking at the officer in front of her. She turned the key again, but it was still locked. She investigated every bit of her dashboard, every mechanism around the steering wheel and then realized what the culprit was.

 

“Are you gonna start your car or what sweetie?”

 

She switched her lights off, even though they’d been on all night and her battery was dead and the lights weren’t even on. There was absolutely no way she was moving her car. She shot a quick text to Willas.

 

_HELP. Pls bring car and jumper cables. ASAP_

 

Which autocorrected to

 

  _Hello pals being car and imperial call ASAP_

“Hey, look girly, I’m not gonna wait for you to text your girlfriends. If you’re not able to move your car you’re getting a ticket.”

 

She shot out of her car at that and sent a follow-up correction text with the corrected plea for help. Her keys and her phone were held out in a surrendering motion when the officer brought his booklet out again with a cough. “Wait, please, sir, my battery’s dead. I can’t actually move it, but my boyfriend’s on his way and he’ll be able to jumpstart it.”

 

“Just call Triple A. You can appeal the ticket with the receipt.”

 

 _Because I’m an adult who spent all of her money on college and now doesn’t have the money for roadside assistance-_ “Unfortunately I don’t have Triple A. Definitely rethinking that budgeting choice,” she laughed. The officer didn’t and he put pen to paper. “Wait! Look, my boyfriend will be here,” she glanced down at her phone when it chimed with his reply, “in 15 minutes. Please, I’m just a broke bartender and you’d be saving me if you’d just let me go today. You’d be doing me such a solid.”

 

The officer looked down at his watch. “So at 7:30 you’ll move your car even though street-sweeping commences at 7 and goes until 9. Like that,” he gestured behind him, “sign says. You can read can’t you?”

 

“Yes I can read,” she spat. Her voice raised and she gave up trying to keep a civil tone. “And I can also _see_ that there is no street sweeping commencing!”

 

Then the writing commenced.

 

“No stop! Oh my god I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have shouted at you. That was absolutely uncalled for. I just-”

 

The officer shook his head. “Nope, not gonna dig yourself out of this one sweetheart. Broke or not, you can take it up with the number on the bottom of this ticket.”

 

“No! Wait, please, I’m going to move my car! Why can’t you just- Like, there aren’t any other cars on this street! It’s gonna get cleaned. There will be a patch where mine is. Honestly I’ll like, clean it myself! I’ll be a good citizen and clean this patch of street myself. It’s just my car, but really, mine is going to be _gone_ by the time the cleaning even commences, but if it isn’t I’ll take it upon myself to mop this patch of street and make it shine.”

 

The officer continued to ignore her rambling and wrote down her license plate number. She barely blamed him but she was still gonna fight.

 

“Look officer,” she at his name tag, “Thomas. Officer Thomas, please, someone is on their way right now.”

 

“Sweetheart, I’m not gonna stop writing this ticket. You should save your breath and shut your mouth.”

 

The early morning wake up call was irritating. The forgetting her keys had increased that irritation. The dead battery had shortened her patience with the world. The patronizing tone had been enough to set her over the edge but she didn’t. But the universe really wasn’t looking out for her it seemed so she gave up any pretense of being kind.

 

“Excuse me? Are you?” Her keys cut into her palm when she clenched her fist. “Are you _fucking kidding me_? _Shut my mouth_? Okay. Okay. I was trying to be civil, man. And you tossed around ‘sweetie’ and ‘girly’ and ‘sweetheart’ like they were appropriate terms for an officer, whether he’s a fucking parking ticket officer or a regular officer, to be tossing about to someone. Would you say that to a-”

 

He tore the ticket off and made eye contact with her as he slowly placed it under her windshield wiper. Then he smiled and walked towards his car. “Have a nice day _sweetheart_.”

 

“No you don’t get to have the last word! You’re an asshole for doing this! And you’re here getting your kicks off of this aren’t you?”

 

He shrugged. “I have the right to remain silent.”

 

Sansa’s eyes widened. “What? Am I- What bullshit are you- Are you kidding me? Are you pissed because you had to wake up early and ruing people’s days? Because it seems like this is the kind of-”  

 

“What the bloody hell are you shouting about in the street at seven in the morning?”

 

“ _Fucking hell_ ,” she muttered. Of course newspaper neighbor was going to get involved. And the first thing he’d ever say to her was a question about her utter madness in the street. “ _Actually,_ it’s 7:25 in the morning and you know what?” She turned back to the officer. “There’s no _street sweeper!_ ”

 

“Yeah, your boyfriend’s not here either sweetie!” The officer slammed his door shut and started driving away.

 

“You stereotypical, toxic, idiotic offi-” she ran after his car but her neighbor grabbed her by the waist.

 

“Oh no, I don’t think you want to get a ticket _and_ get arrested before the day even properly begins,” he muttered.

 

She jerked out of his arms and knelt down to retrieve her keys and her phone which had dropped in the process. “Get off of me! Jesus Christ, how is that your first inclination? Manhandling someone? Seriously?”

 

“Oh sorry!” His hands came up in the air, an exasperated shrug. “Guess I should have just watched you get arrested for attempting to assault a police officer.”

 

“ _Parking_ officer,” she muttered. “And I wasn’t going to assault him… just his car.”

 

Her neighbor retied his robe over his shirt and boxers and then gave her a once over. She was reminded of just how prissy her matching set of pajamas looked to anyone who didn’t know her. And the amount of time his eyes spent lingering on her legs reminded her just how short her shorts were. No man was on her good side this morning. First a parking meter cop, second this fucking pervy neighbor. She cleared her throat and he raised his eyebrows. “Yeah, you were really gonna do some damage sweetheart.”

 

“Can the male portion of the human race on this block just _chill out_ on the patronizing sexism for maybe like, five minutes this morning?”

 

“I mean, I couldn’t do any damage to that car if it makes it equal in your eyes. No sexism there.”

 

She shook her head and took a breath. “Very funny, _sweetheart._ ”

 

He shrugged. “Just the truth. Now, what’s got you shouting in the street, waking up the whole neighborhood? You parked on the street. It’s Wednesday. What did you think was going to happen?”

 

“What did I think was going to happen?" She grinned. "I'm  _so glad_ you asked. Well first, I didn’t think my car was going to die. But it did. So my car died and I texted my boyfriend and I _explained_ that my boyfriend would be here any minute to jump it and he just started writing the ticket anyway insisting that cleaning commences at seven on the dot even though it’s past seven and there’s still no sweeper in sight! But that wasn’t enough for him. He decided to be a patronizing asshole instead of a decent human being just so he can get some stupid commission or whatever it is that these idiotic tickets do for society! And it’s all just a rigged system anyway just to make more money off of people who already pay exorbitant taxes and there’s still no fucking sweeper on this street!” She picked up the ticket and waved it in the air angrily.

 

He titled his head and furrowed his brow at her rant. “Why wait for your boyfriend? Why not ask one of your neighbors to jumpstart your car? They’d probably be decent human begins and it’d be quicker than waiting.”

 

Sansa’s mouth dropped open. She closed it and bit her lip before breathing in and out. Had he truly forgotten who he was? How he'd ignored her the past three years? “I’m sorry?  Which decent neighbors are you referring to? Because I know it can’t be yourself Mr. ‘I’m gonna fucking ignore this girl anytime she tries to say anything or, god forbid, _wave_ at me.’ You _blinked_ at me this morning and now you wanna act like the neighborhood welcome committee? I don’t know any of our neighbors because they’re all the same as you. They live in their tiny bubbles and act like human decency is gonna kill them. But yeah sure I’ll walk up your driveway and just knock on your door like Anne of Green Gables to ask for some help.”

 

Her neighbor opened his mouth to speak then closed it with a smirk. His mustache and lips twitched and she swore if the next thing out of his mouth was a laugh a real officer was going to come and solve a homicide case. When he spoke, his voice was softer and had less sarcasm dripping from it. “Fair enough, I’m not the most sociable person. And I’m pretty sure the rest of our neighbors aren’t either. Can I see this for a moment?” He gestured to the crumpled ticket in her hand. She relinquished it to him. He glanced at it and handed it back to her. “I’ll be right back. Would you mind waiting?”

 

“I mean, I’m already doing that anyway,” she replied with more venom than his voice made her feel was truly necessary.

 

His lips quirked into a smirk again and he strode back up his stupid driveway and back into his house. She crossed her arms against the morning chill and wished she’d slept in something other than shorts and a t-shirt. Her phone chimed again and she looked at the text from Willas.

 

_Sorry baby, stuck in traffic. Delayed another ten minutes._

She groaned, smacked her head against the hood of her car, and then texted back.

 

_Don’t rush. Drive safe. See you in a bit. <3 _

When she looked up her neighbor was approaching her again. He’d put jeans on and had a piece of paper clutched in his hand. He held it out to her. She glanced down at it and then back at his face. There was no hint of a joke. He was being serious. 

 

“No. I’m not taking that.”

 

“Think of it as something a decent human being would do.”

 

“$180 is more than decent.” She shook her head. “Thank you, but no thank you.”

 

He sighed and rubbed at the stubble on his face. “You ruin my early morning coffee and newspaper, then yell at me for being an indecent neighbor, and then you say no to my act of kindness?" He shook his head. "You’re not going to be able to appeal it. Do you really want to pay for it?”

 

Sansa chewed her cheek. “Obviously I don’t, but I’m not gonna take your money. This is the first conversation I’ve ever actually had with you. In three years.”

 

“But that’s _my_ fault.” He smiled. “You’ve tried the past three years, as you reminded me this morning.”

 

“Wait, no that’s not-”

 

He held out the check again. “Think of it as an apology for my behavior. An apology for three years of ignoring your kindness.”

 

“This is ridiculous.”

 

“This morning has been ridiculous. Just take the check. Please.”

 

She weighed the cost. Perhaps the neighbor wasn’t as pervy as his oggling or his mustache and beard combination made him seem. Perhaps he was just a good Samaritan in a green bathrobe who really was just anti-social and wanted to enjoy the rest of his morning that she'd kind of ruined. Or perhaps he was a murderer or a conman who planned on using this against her. Her mind raced to a thousand different over-dramatic scenarios from her mom's favorite Lifetime movies. Then she thought about the idiotic ticket and her car’s dead battery and how she’d probably have to get a new one or a new car or something costly. Then she took a breath.

 

“You’re really thinking too hard about this. Just take it,” he chuckled.

 

She shrugged. “Okay fine. I will." She took the piece of paper. "I really don’t want to pay for this. So thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

The name on the check was _Petyr Baelish_. “Petyr?” She asked as if double-checking whether he was sticking to a con. She really knew nothing about him and her desperation was blocking any sensible thought. She’d take a conman’s money.

He nodded with a smile. "The y is kind of funky."

 

“It's original. It’s nice to formally meet you Petyr, possibly in the _worst_ way possible. My name’s Sansa. I’m sorry for causing a scene outside of your house so early.”

 

“Sansa, it’s a pleasure to meet you as well,” he replied with a laugh. “Do you want me to jump you?”

 

A shiver went through her that she blamed again on the cold. _Get it together girl. This guy gives you some money and treats you nicely after three years of indifference and your mind goes there?_

 

“Can your car handle that? Looks ancient.” She gestured to his Volvo with the check.

 

“I prefer _vintage_. It’s not quite a Mayan or Mesopotamian car. I treat it well enough that it could,” he laughed. “But I’ve got a car in my garage as well that could probably match yours.”

 

“No, seriously don’t worry about it. You’ve already been way too kind already. My boyfriend will be here any minute. He’ll help me out.”

 

“Fair enough. I say you leave it on the street though.” He shrugged. “Damage has already been done. Fuck the system and all that.”

 

Sansa laughed. A guy who easily handed over $180 to a stranger who’d been yelling in the street fifteen minutes prior wasn’t one she imagined would ever utter the phrase _fuck the system_.

 

“I would but the person actually trying to clean the street doesn’t deserve that.” She smiled and then tilted her head to the side. “Now if it was that officer… I’d get all my friends to come park on this street right now.” Petyr laughed at that, but their moment was coming to an end so she wanted to give him an easy out. “Thank you. Seriously. You’re a life saver. I owe you.”

 

“You don’t.”

 

“I do. Now go enjoy your newspapers Petyr. Thank you again.”

 

“You’re very welcome Sansa. Don’t forget next Wednesday though. I’m not fond of hellos in the street, let alone shouting.”

 

She was growing very accustomed to his smirk and wished he’d started showing it sooner. “I’ll remember that.”

**Author's Note:**

> I saw someone get a street sweeping ticket today and this popped into my head. It's definitely not as flirty as it could have been but I'm mostly just trying to get back into writing again. So bear with me y'all. I just need to reread some Alayne chapters or rewatch the show to get back into the headspace of these characters and their amazing chemistry. After three days of attempting to get 1,000 words about anything out, this one finally just clicked. It's silly but it's here and out in the world now.


End file.
